On Navigating Difference in Intercultural & Interracial Partnerships (Part Two)
In Part One of this blog, I discussed many of the common cultural differences that interracial and intercultural partnerships face, as well as some tips for how to navigate those differences. In Part Two, I want to talk about another common challenge these partnerships face—power and privilege imbalances.
what is social location & why does it matter?
Power and privilege imbalances can arise when the social location of you and your partner(s) differ. Social location is an individual’s status within society. It is based on the social groups to which you belong that make up your identities and impact how society looks upon and treats you. It greatly influences your access to power and privilege within society. Access to power and privilege, in turn, affects your access to resources, ability to self-actualize, the influence you have over others, and more.
On the surface, social location appears to be outside of a relationship, but it can play a crucial role in the power dynamics within the relationship, leading to disparities in a number of areas, including decision-making power and emotional well-being. Here are some other examples of power and privilege disparities that may occur between interracial partners:
Financial disparities that can create imbalances in decision-making and lifestyle choices
Level of education and wealth disparities that can impact how partners perceive themselves and each other, which can potentially lead to feelings of inadequacy or insecurity arising from educational differences or struggles related to financial contributions and responsibilities
Discrimination and microaggressions experienced by the couple or a partner based on their identities
Differences in age and ability, which can impact how partners perceive their roles and responsibilities within the relationship and can pose challenges related to accessibility and accommodation for partners with disabilities
Immigration status, informing legal and emotional challenges in the relationship, as well as concerns regarding relocation, assimilation, and cultural adaptation
managing differences in power & privilege in partnership
Even if power and privilege disparities exist in your relationship, you can build a thriving relationship with your partner if you approach these disparities with curiosity, openness, and an intentional effort to be collaborative. Here are some ways you and your partner can explore this work together:
Try to examine each of your social locations by reflecting on the intersections of your identity, including race, ethnicity, gender, age, sexual orientation, ability, religion, socioeconomic status, social class, generation, and regionality.
Acknowledge any privilege or power imbalances and commit to equal decision-making, planning, and mutual respect. Work as a team to set plans that reflect each partner’s aspirations.
Promote a supportive and encouraging environment for each partner's educational and professional pursuits. Work as a team to jointly plan financial goals and be transparent about individual financial situations.
Be active allies for one another, providing emotional support, reassurance, and understanding during challenging times or times of uncertainty and transition. Educate yourselves about the experiences and issues faced by each partner's identity group.
Emphasize the strengths and unique qualities each of you brings to your relationship, irrespective of age or ability. Ensure an inclusive environment that considers and accommodates the needs of a partner with disabilities.
Seek legal advice and support to navigate immigration processes and requirements.
Interracial relationships can be beautiful and rewarding, but they require open communication, empathy, and a willingness to understand and embrace each other's cultural differences and unique identities. By acknowledging and addressing these challenges together, you can foster a stronger, healthier, and more resilient relationship that celebrates diversity and promotes equity. As a therapist, I encourage you and your partner or partners to engage in open dialogue, continuous learning, and mutual support to create a thriving relationship that honors each of your unique backgrounds and experiences.
Alex Thompson is an Associate Marriage and Family Therapist who is passionate about providing care to marginalized folx who have been historically denied access to therapy. She is a liberation-oriented therapist with special interest in supporting folx wanting to navigate the emotional, social, and behavioral experiences of living with chronic illness and chronic pain, grief and loss, and generational and racial trauma. She helps individuals, couples, and folx in non-traditional partnerships reimagine pathways to healing and wellness, as well as ways to exist more authentically in their environment and relationships.
Fun facts: Alex is an avid tea drinker and reality tv watcher; enjoys cooking with loved one’s; and gets excited about camping.
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